Hmmm…in retrospect, perhaps they should have picked the aardvark. In surprisingly short order, the Vatican conclave chooses conservative enforcer Joseph Ratzinger as the new pope, which likely means trouble ahead for progressive Catholics. Once one of Hitler’s pups (albeit somewhat reluctantly), Pope Benedict XVI, a.k.a. “God’s Rottweiler,” has spent his career railing against “the dictatorship of relativism” and acting as a divider, not a uniter…and he’s shown he’s not above moonlighting as one of Dubya’s hounds if need be. On virtually every major issue facing the Church today, Benedict XVI stands firmly on the side of the fourteenth century, and his ascension to the papacy seems to herald an era of retrograde retrenchment for the Vatican. Boo hiss.