We are Heath Ledger.

Soon after Heath Ledger’s untimely death (ultimately ruled an accident) a few weeks ago, there was a rumor floating around that Johnny Depp would step in to save Terry Gilliam’s Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus by playing the “mirror-world” Heath. (“There is a point in the film when Heath falls through a magic mirror. He could change into another character after that and that is where Johnny would come in.“) As it turns out, the truth is even more interesting. According to AICN, Johnny Depp, Jude Law and Colin Farrell have all signed on for Imaginarium to pay tribute to Ledger and to help salvage his final performance. All class acts…here’s hoping Gilliam can make something special out of Ledger’s final bow.

The Plame Identity: Kidman.

“‘I have a really, really insane take on how to tell it. It’s so outrageous,’ Liman said. ‘Ultimately, I’d be doing something no one has ever done before. Therefore it’s automatically appealing to me. I’m just starting to explore whether [what I have in mind] is even possible to do.’” Doug Liman, director of The Bourne Identity, Mr. & Mrs. Smith, and the upcoming Jumper, promotes his next project, a Valerie Plame biopic starring Nicole Kidman. Maybe he can get Josh Brolin to pull double duty as Dubya.

Brothers in Anxiety.

For his next film after Vicky Crista Barcelona, Woody Allen returns to New York City with the perfect Allen analogue, Larry David (and Evan Rachel Wood). Which reminds me, I saw the eminently missable Cassandra’s Dream two weekends ago and will post a review sometime soon, although “eminently missable” gets most of the point across.

No Country for Slow Men.

“Here, I’m the referee, and I want a fair, true portrait of the man. How did Bush go from an alcoholic bum to the most powerful figure in the world? It’s like Frank Capra territory on one hand, but I’ll also cover the demons in his private life, his bouts with his dad and his conversion to Christianity, which explains a lot of where he is coming from. It includes his belief that God personally chose him to be president of the United States, and his coming into his own with the stunning, preemptive attack on Iraq. It will contain surprises for Bush supporters and his detractors.” No joke: Oliver Stone announces his next project will be a George W. Bush biopic, with Josh Brolin attached. I must admit, as someone who really liked Nixon, I’m curious to see where he goes with it.

James? No, Gemma.

Official word comes down that newcomer Gemma Arterton (seen at right as Rosaline in Love’s Labour’s Lost) will be 007’s next love interest (or one of them, at least) in Bond 22, tentatively called 007 and due out this Christmas. She joins Daniel Craig (in his second Bond outing), Jeffrey Wright (returning as Felix Leiter), and Mathieu Amalric as the villain. “Arterton will play ‘Fields’ in the Marc Forster-directed movie…Details of her character were not available, but a Danjaq rep said ‘it’s a nice-sized role.’ The film will take up where 2006’s ‘Casino Royale‘ left off.

Da Abbie H Show.

Move over Lincoln Liam and Sally Todd: It seems Steven Spielberg’s next post-Indy project may involve Sasha Baron Cohen as Abbie Hoffman in The Trial of the Chicago Seven (not to be confused with the Seattle Seven, i.e. the Dude “and, uh, six other guys.”) “The Spielberg film is said to be closer to Munich…than to his next Indiana Jones frolic, due in the summer.” Could be good, and Cohen is dead-on casting. Still, I’ve been looking forward to Spielberg’s Lincoln, and the Hoffman story was done rather recently with Vincent D’Onofrio and Steal this Movie. Update: Concerning the rest of the cast, the recent Vanity Fair Indy article suggests Philip Seymour Hoffman is up for William Kunstler (i.e. the Chicago 7’s lawyer) and that Will Smith, Taye Diggs, Adam Arkin, and Kevin Spacey are also being considered for roles.

Keanu Barada Draper.

Peace on Earth, goodwill to Mad Men: Jon Hamm, a.k.a. Dick Whitman/Don Draper, joins the cast of Scott Derrickson’s The Day The Earth Stood Still remake, currently starring Keanu Reeves (the alien) and Jennifer Connelly. “Hamm will play Dr. Granier, a NASA official who recruits Helen (Connelly) for the scientific team investigating an alien’s arrival on Earth.” Hamm’s impressive on Mad Men, and it’ll be good to see him make the leap to the Big Screen…but an unnecessary remake of a 50’s sci-fi classic from the director of The Exorcism of Emily Rose? I have doubts.