Category: Fanboy

The End of All Things.

(But, wait, there’s room for a little more.) I could say that I haven’t posted here in two days because of the increased end-of-year work burden or the recent cable Internet outage at home base, and yes, those both played their part. But, to be honest, I’ve been spending most of my hours since Wednesday afternoon perusing the long-awaited Return of the King: Extended Edition. (Thank you, NYC fanboy underground…strangely enough, I ended up being one of the first to procure the precious, and have thus been answering spoiler-filled queries over at Tolkien Online the past two days.)

So, how is it? As with the FotR:EE and the TTT:EE, the Extended Edition is clearly a better film than the theatrical cut, with richer, denser characterizations, more Tolkien lore, and an improved sense of flow. Whatsmore, to my mind the two biggest problems with the RotK:TE have been rectified: 1) Denethor’s screen time has been doubled, and — while he still doesn’t get his palantir — the Steward is now much more multifaceted and grief-stricken than before. 2) Both Frodo & Sam’s journey through Mordor and the time between Pelennor Fields and the Black Gates have been extended, giving the Land of Shadow much more heft and menace. As you’d expect, there’s lots of great stuff here for fans of the book…Voice of Saruman stands out in particular as a scene laden to the brim with Tolkien’s prose, and such iconic moments as the Crossroads and Sam seeing the star in Mordor now get their rightful due.

That being said, some fans are going to be disappointed by the short shrift given to certain chapters (and by King Elessar’s blatant disregard for the rules of parley.) The Houses of Healing and the Eowyn-Faramir romance are touched on very lightly, and there is NO new footage included after the Crack of Doom. (I’d guess this is probably PJ’s payback to all the “multiple ending” critics, but still, I was very much looking forward to more Grey Havens…particularly more of Frodo’s final words. (“It must often be so, Sam, when things are in danger: someone has to give them up, lose them, so that others may keep them.”)

In fact, the extended RotK is the first time I’ve felt that PJ & New Line may be deliberately holding back on some of the choice footage. On the writer-director commentary, PJ admits to not including certain very memorable scenes (the Watchers of Cirith Ungol, the various weddings and epilogues) in this cut for “pacing reasons” (?), and that perhaps they’ll show up on the “25th anniversary” version. I don’t want to ascribe nefarious motives to the guy after all he’s done to create these amazing films, but this sounds to me suspiciously like a ploy to sell some HD-DVD box sets in a few years.

But, still, that’s the ring talking. All in all, RotK:EE, like its predecessors, is a wonderful gift to the fans of Tolkien and Middle Earth. And, although we have come now to the end, these three DVD sets (which look great on the shelf together) will now live on forever as a beacon of hope to fandom.

Toyz in the Hood.

Damn, it feels good to be a scoundrel…By way of the slightly relocated Lots of Co., and because the world demanded it, here’s an amateur Geto Boys video (“Mind Playin’ Tricks on Me”) done with Star Wars figures. As you’d probably expect, some harsh language herein, so keep the sound down in your workplace.

Hope is kindled.

“Like the first two ‘Rings’ DVDs, the extended ‘ROTK’ isn’t just for obsessives. It’s a flat-out better movie than the one that swept the Oscars. It’s more emotionally generous and, despite the extra girth, more brisk and exciting.” Along with visiting the set of Kong, Newsweek gushes over the RotK:EE, due out in the next few weeks (Officially, Dec. 14…unofficially, we’ll see.) Speaking of which, the official site is supposed to be releasing a new clip sometime today, so keep an eye on the palantir for it. Update: It’s up…including some choice new stuff from the Crossroads and the journey through Mordor. Update 2: Most of the parley with the Mouth of Sauron is now also available for download…he’s a right rotten bastid, ain’t he?

The Doom of Man.

No, that’s not a fanboy conventioner…it’s the first pic of Julian McMahon in full Dr. Doom regalia to make it online. Oof, I must say, Fantastic Four is starting to look like an absolute disaster. Elsewhere in comic film news, the full trailer for Batman Begins will apparently premiere in front of Ocean’s Twelve next month.

Bourne to Watch.

Word is from AICN that a replacement for Darren Aronofsky has been found to helm the film adaptation of The Watchmen…and it’s Paul Greengrass (late of Bloody Sunday and The Bourne Supremacy.) Greengrass hasn’t shown yet that he can handle an FX-laden extravaganza (as the film will need to do justice to Dr. Manhattan and Ozymandias), but his edgy hand-held aesthetic might be just about perfect for Rorshach’s part of the story.

D for Don’t Blow It.

Another classic Alan Moore property moves to the big screen as Matrix and Star Wars AD James McTeigue takes the reins of V for Vendetta. I haven’t read V in over a decade, but I remember it as being rather dark and political. Well, let’s hope it’s more From Hell than LXG. Is Miracleman next?

His Dark Malcontent.

And, speaking of people screaming down the Murphometer, what the hell got into Philip Pullman? “The Lord of the Rings is not a serious book because it does not say anything interesting, or new, or truthful about the human condition,’ he told [author Jeanette] Winterson in an interview in the December issue of Harpers & Queen.” Hmm…really? Coulda fooled me. But, then again, I guess people have just found truth, meaning, and solace in Tolkien’s trilogy for fifty years now because it has elves and wizards and dragons and stuff. Look, LotR may not be Pullman’s cup of tea — Lord knows, the last book of His Dark Materials certainly wasn’t mine, what with all its Milton-wannabe sermonizing and anti-Narnia heavy-handedness — but I see no real need to badmouth Tolkien so emphatically (and indefensibly.) Pullman was probably just trying to gain some indy cred with the fantasy-dismissive Booker prize types, but from here his remarks just come off as sour grapes. I really liked The Golden Compass, but, come on now…What a prat.