Poker-faced Liars.

Editors: Can you show us your cards? Cheney: Sure. One of them’s a six.” By way of Value Judgment, experience the tribulations of poker with Dick Cheney. “Cheney: We will show you our cards after we have collected the pot. It is important that things be done in this order, otherwise the foundation of our entire poker game will be destroyed.Update: In semi-related news, the Supreme Court bails out Cheney 7-2 on the energy task force documents, although they also decided to punt the case back to a lower court. Hmmm.

I, Sim.

Resident Evil Outbreak’s humans are realistic, but their facial expressions are so deadeningly weird they’re almost scarier than the actual zombies you’re fighting. The designers of 007: Everything or Nothing managed to take the adorable Shannon Elizabeth and render her as a walleyed replicant.Slate‘s Clive Thompson examines game developers’ struggles through the Uncanny Valley.

UnFree Spin.

Manufacturers design games primarily for women over 55 with lots of time and disposable income, and casinos near retirement communities…operate small fleets of jitneys that shuttle back and forth to assisted-living centers. As a come-on, one casino advertises free oxygen-tank refills for its players, and heart defibrillators are increasingly becoming standard equipment inside casinos…As one old Las Vegas hand put it, the country’s casinos are now providing ‘day care for the elderly.’” The NY Times Magazine delves into the fantastic rise of slot machines as the casinos’ prime cash cow.

Affleck’s Revenge.

One of the few shows I caught regularly last fall, Celebrity Poker Showdown returns for a second season on May 27, with Kid in the Hall Dave Foley replacing Kevin Pollack. This time around, the players will include Sean Astin, Jennie Garth, James Woods, Matthew Perry, Angie Dickinson, and Dave Navarro. Samwise versus Big Bad Mama…I’m so there.

Examine Nunnery.

Though this be madness, yet there is method in’t. By way of my sis-in-law Lotta, the Hamlet text adventure game. How cool is this? I look forward to playing it through once I finish up my freelance work. Here’s a tip…don’t jump out of Ophelia’s window. Update: Ok, I got distracted and went ahead and beat the game. It’s pretty clever, except for one really dumb and annoying puzzle that involves screaming a word in a theater. I used the hint to beat it…and the author basically admits that he intended it that way. Oh well, other than that one hiccup, it’s great text-adventure fun.