“Cheering and screaming! Every Sunday I would cheer and scream for what?! How can they do this! 13-3 and home field advantage and they lost to the f**king New York Giants!…ELI SUCKS!” How did William Shirer miss this? As seen at TNR: From deep within his bunker, Adolf Hitler laments the Dallas Cowboys’ season. Perhaps in poor taste, as jokes making light of the Nazis often are, but still, I found this pretty doggone funny. (And it brought back fond memories of Mr. Bimmler.)
Category: Sports
Isiahfield.
“Isiah’s rhetoric has always been persuasive. He’s been dealt a bad hand. He had to make extreme moves. Every trade he’s made, the Knicks have come out ahead on talent. No one, he implies, could’ve done any more. But to get a handle on what Isiah’s done as a GM, I’ve evaluated every major move he’s made during his tenure, from trades to free-agent signings to draft picks to coaching hires. The record seems to be seriously at odds with Isiah’s claims.” In a two-part series, ESPN’s Chad Ford surveys the colossal wreckage made of the New York Knickerbockers, and suggests the way to start digging out.
Twenties Yard Line.
“You’re the kind of cocktail that comes on like sugar but gives you a kick in the head.” Star and director George Clooney takes a period-piece page from his Coen buddies in the new trailer for his football comedy Leatherheads, also with John Krazinski and Renee Zellweger. Given Clooney’s track record with Confessions of a Dangerous Mind and Good Night, and Good Luck, I’d probably have seen this anyway. But throw in the mid-twenties flavor and Brazil‘s Jonathan Pryce and it’s a lock.
From Black Sox to Juiceball.
“‘Everyone involved in baseball over the past two decades — commissioners, club officials, the players’ association and players — shares to some extent the responsibility for the steroids era,’ Mitchell said in summation of his 20-month investigation. ‘There was a collective failure to recognize the problem as it emerged and to deal with it early on.‘” Former Senator (and go-to commission guy) George Mitchell’s report on Steroids in Baseball is released. And, while outing a number of star players as users (including Roger Clemens, Andy Pettite, Eric Gagne, David Justice, John Rocker, Gary Sheffield, and Mo Vaughn), Mitchell instead argues for change and collective responsibility rather than the initiation of a witchhunt. It does seem obvious, based on the list of names, that steroids were rife throughout the sport and can’t be limited to any one clubhouse (although there sure are a lot of Yankees named, aren’t there?) Well, here’s hoping they find a way to clean it all up. For my part, and as I’ve said several times now, major league baseball ranks somewhere down near hockey and golf in the list of sports I enjoy watching and following. Give me the NBA, or even the MLS, any day of the week (and the NFL twice on Sunday.)
“A League-Wide Joke.”
“‘Embarrassing,’ Zach Randolph said…’I don’t know what else to say.‘” Sadly, the Knickerbocker meltdown continues. In an nationally-televised game on TNT, the Knicks get blown out in Boston, 104-59, “their third-worst loss and their second-worst scoring performance of the shot-clock era.” (The only reason it wasn’t the worst-ever was because Nate Robinson hit a 37-foot three-pointer at the final buzzer.) “In an incredible display of surrender, with 8:09 left and the Celtics mounting a 50-point lead on Eddie House’s jumper, a Knicks fan sitting behind the basket ripped off his blue Knicks jersey, threw it onto the court in a rage and marched up the stairs and out of the building as Celtics fans applauded.” I saw that guy (yes, I was watching this fiasco rather than the Cowboys-Packers game), and knew exactly how he felt. Really, how much worse does it need to get? Look at the picture above — It’s only the second quarter, and nobody’s listening to Isiah. Fire him already.
Marburied Hopes.
“‘Isiah has to start me,’ Marbury fumed, according to the source. ‘I’ve got so much (stuff) on Isiah and he knows it. He thinks he can (get) me. But I’ll (get) him first. You have no idea what I know.‘” (Some choice suggestions on what Starbury knows in the comment thread here: I like “It was Isiah’s call to cancel Arrested Development” and “Isiah does not care about black people.“) Yep, the once-promising 2007-2008 Knickerbockers imploded early this year, with our overpaid, underachieving, untradeable “star” point guard Stephon Marbury leaving the team in a huff over coming off the bench — at the start of a tough four game road trip — and now threatening to expose Isiah Thomas’s dirty laundry (as if we didn’t get enough of that with this past summer’s sexual harrassment case.) How will the saga of the Traveling Marbury pan out? Will Stephon be handled with care or sent to the end of the line? Either way, I expect the Knicks to stay moribund so long as this PG, this GM, and this owner are running the show at the Garden. (NY Daily News and Deadspin links sent to me via Ben of The Oak, who also birddogged a great find last week with these graphical representations of hip-hop.) Update: The prodigal Knick returns to a loss in LA, but something’s still rotten at MSG.
Hardball | Hardwood.
“‘Whether it’s fair or not fair, the fact of the matter is that my colleague from New York, Senator Clinton, there are 50 percent of the American public that say they’re not going to vote for her. I’m not saying anything that people don’t know already. I don’t necessarily like it, but those are the facts,’ Dodd said.” Edwards, Obama, and Dodd (finally) release the hounds at last night’s Democratic debate in Philadelphia. Said Edwards: “I mean, another perspective on why the Republicans keep talking about Senator Clinton is, Senator, they may actually want to run against you, and that’s the reason they keep bringing you up.” (Update: Edwards’ Youtube team pounces on the politics of parsing.)To be honest, I DVR’ed the debate and haven’t watched it yet, partly because I’m rather dispirited about the whole process (among other things) these days, and partly because the NBA’s opening-night double-header was on TNT…which means, if nothing else, there should be something on TV most nights from now until June. (The Knicks start Friday.)
Trials by Fire.
I’ve been derelict in posting here the past week, but obviously there’ve been some pretty dismal stories in the news of late, from the fiery swath of destruction visited upon California to the horrifying house fire that claimed seven South Carolinians. To those who’ve lost friends or family (or homes) in the recent conflagrations, my heart goes out to you. (And one bright spot amid the tales of woe, congrats to the 2007 BoSox for their second World Series sweep this decade. The Curse is now assuredly laid to rest.)
Hou II in the Orange and Blue?
“I’ve seen the Garden in some of its best moments, and I truly believe that this team is on the verge of experiencing that again.” Allen Houston returns to the New York Knicks, two years after retiring with a bad knee. Well, ok. Houston was always pretty one-dimensional as a player — he’s a shooter, and not much else (I’d rather have Sprewell back, to be honest.) But when he’s on, he’s on, and the (2-0!) Knicks will need someone to spread the floor from outside in any case, with both Curry and Randolph clogging up the paint. Houston’s no silver bullet for this squad, and he might not make the roster anyway, but let’s hope it works out. “‘If he’s the Allan Houston we know, we haven’t seen him in a while, but if he’s that good a player, we want good players,’ said Thomas.” Update: Scratch that…aborted at the launchpad. “With the season opening less than two weeks away, I think it is best for the team to move on without me.” Sigh…not what you’d call a feel-good story.
Isiah 11.6.
“‘What I did here, I did for every working woman in America,’ said Browne Sanders, who came out of the courtroom beaming. ‘And that includes everyone who gets up and goes to work in the morning..” The NBA’s nightmare off-season continues with (just as during the regular season) a loss for the Knicks: A jury finds MSG, owner James Dolan, and Knicks coach Isiah Thomas guilty of sexual harassment and liable for $11.6 million in damages. The occasional Post headline screaming at me from the local deli notwithstanding, I haven’t been following all the twists and turns of this ugly case, other than that I heard Stephon Marbury somehow got caught up in it too for having consensual sex with a Garden employee. Regardless, this is a total embarrassment for the NBA and for New York basketball, and one hopes Commissioner Stern will crack down hard on Dolan & co. if MSG doesn’t clean house, and soon.