Category: Sports

Scorn of the Sox.

“Dear Roger Clemens: Let me offer my hearty congratulations on starting the All-Star Game. Wow, that is really terrific. I’d like to note, however, that I hate you. Also: You are fat. They say you’ve got this hard-core training regimen, with calisthenics and whatnot. I’m not seeing it. You’re wicked fat.” Slate‘s Seth Stevenson exercises (and exorcises) his contempt for the Rocket.

Kobespiracy Theory.

As NBA teams around the league rush to SoCal to prostrate themselves before Kobe, ESPN columnist Frank Hughes wonders aloud about Bryant’s rumored interest in the Denver Nuggets. “Could it be that [Denver GM Kiki] Vandeweghe, in his attempt to garner positive public relations for his own organization…has unwittingly contaminated a potential jury pool of Bryant’s ‘peers?’ Could it be that Bryant, whether intentionally or unintentionally, either on the advice of his lawyers, agent or neither, is playing a card that may have desired affects [sic] beyond the basketball court?” Hmm. That sounds entirely too conspiratorial to me. But, then again, there’s a reason Team Kobe gets paid the big bucks…

Feeling a Draft.

Antawn Jamison to DC (for Stackhouse, Laettner, and No. 5) is a done deal…is T-Mac to Houston next? Or will the Diesel do Dallas? Last year’s NBA Draft Day was a bit of a dud as far as big trades go, but I have high hopes for tonight’s festivities, even if the Knicks don’t have a first-rounder and will probably stand pat.

Things Fall Apart.

“It looks like Buss, the Lakers’ owner, has made his choice: Kobe stays; the others can go. In other words, he is not averse to trading Shaq and is willing to build his franchise around a narcissist who’s on trial for rape, doesn’t make his teammates better and is in denial over all of it.” Well, it looks like my concerns about Kobe joining the Knicks were unfounded. At the behest of Bryant, Lakers owner Jerry Buss sends Phil Jackson off, with Shaq soon to follow. I never really bought into the Zen Master hype, but Phil Jackson is assuredly a better coach than Rudy T. And letting Shaq walk to appease Kobe? That’s just ludicrous…The big guy may be on the downslope of his career, but he’s still in a league of his own.

Beasts of the East.

In a surprisingly commanding performance, the Pistons blow out LA in Game 5 to take their first championship in 14 years (and the first Eastern Conference win since MJ’s last Chicago run in 1998.) As for the star-studded, star-crossed Lakers, the future looks grim. I just hope Gary Payton gets rejuvenated on some other team, and that Kobe doesn’t end up with the Knicks as rumored…They’re my team and all, but I’d have a hard time rooting for New York with the selfish, vainglorious Bryant as their cornerstone.

Almost there.

Detroit D’s up again, and are now only one game away from knocking off the vaunted Lakers in 5. This should’ve been a sweep, if not for Game 2’s ugly last minute. Still, I’ll play it safe and continue believing Pistons-in-7. LA is too good and Shaq too dominant not to have at least one breakout game. Or at least I used to think so. With Kobe sabotaging his own team, who knows?

Get your motor running.

They were up 6 with 40 seconds to go. They were up 6 with 40 seconds to go. I’ll admit, the last-minute Piston collapse in Game 2 has me distraught. Hopefully, Detroit rights the ship in tonight’s Game 3, because the thought of Kobe and the Lakers dancing around the Staples Center with another championship this year makes me ill. So I’ll stick with my pick – this series goes back to LA with Detroit up 3-2, and the Pistons win in 7. Please? Update: Ric Bucher, who to his credit picked Detroit from the start, makes a compelling case that the Lake Show are still the ones in trouble. Let’s hope so.