The films begins with a stop-motion fairy tale. As a (goofily-designed) preadolescent in 1955, Hellboy was told the tale of the Golden Army, an unstoppable goblin-forged force commanded by an elven king in his war against that teeming, grasping nuisance, humanity. But dismayed by the carnage wrought, said king ultimately decided to sign a truce with humankind — men get the cities, elves get the forests — much to the consternation of his son, Prince Nuada. Cut to the present day: The humans have, as WALL-E foreshadowed, plowed through the forests for their strip malls and parking lots, and thus Nuada (Luke Goss) has returned to fight the ancient war anew.
But, standing in his way, for better or worse, are the motley protectors of humankind, the BPRD (Bureau of Paranormal Research and Development). Among their number, the kindly, bookish fish-man Abraham Sapien (Doug Jones, not too far removed from Threepio), the powerful pyrokinetic Liz Sheridan (Selma Blair, all blue fire and bedroom eyes), and, of course, Big Red himself, the kitty-loving, cigar-chomping spawn of Lucifer, Hellboy (Ron Perlman, clearly having fun). But, one must ask, in a war between the freaks and the humans, why are Hellboy et al on the side of the latter, particularly when mankind seems to fear and despise their lot? Clearly, the BPRD gang have some considerations to make.
That’s arguably the main thread of Hellboy II, but there’s quite a bit else going on — too much, in fact. Y’see, Hellboy very much wants to take the team public, and he and Liz are having some space issues, and Liz has a secret of her own, and Abe may have met the (elvish) girl of his dreams, and, along with last film’s comic relief (Jeffrey Tambor), there’s a new freak in town, an ectoplasmic German martinet named Johann Krauss (Seth McFarlane, of Family Guy). Oh, and let’s not forget the Troll Market (a showy cantina-style setpiece in the middle going), a (IMHO, strained) Barry Manilow musical number, and even an encounter with the Angel of Death.
Now some might rightly argue that I’m looking the gift hellspawn in the maw here, and that one should just sit back and relish the cornucopia of imaginative riches on display. Fair enough — There are some memorable images throughout (I particularly liked the autumn of the elemental), and this is miles more interesting than, say, The Incredible Hulk. But I still think the movie would’ve been more captivating had it been less episodic. Despite the many innovative ideas on display, The Golden Army — much like Terry Gilliam’s The Adventures of Baron Munchausen — at times feels more like a notebook dump than a movie. (But as I said, if this what it takes for del Toro to clear the mental decks pre-Hobbit, I’m all for it.)
Nevertheless, if Hellboy was too little, and Hellboy II turned out to be too much, I’d still probably be up for a Hellboy 3, several years from now, on the other side of Middle Earth. Particularly if it goes back to plumbing the Cthulhian depths suggested in the original, the third film could end up being juussst riiight.
We saw it on Friday, despite being underwhelmed by the first movie, and I agree that it’s a much better film than the original. I loved the comic, so it’s nice to see Hellboy realized IRL. I thought the look of the film was great – del Toro sure shows off some great special effects and some fantastic art and creatures. Yet there is something still lacking here, despite all the eye candy, and it seemed like it was mostly due to the low energy of the actors.
Frankly, I thought Luke Goss as Prince Nuada added a lot of energy and was a joy to watch, while the others were just too laissez-faire (particularly Selma Blair, who I never liked as Liz). It didn’t feel like they cared much about anything. With the exception of the locker-room fight (where I thought Perlman showed some real spark, and I really liked the idea of the Krauss character) it just felt kind of bland and soulless to me. Kind of like the first two Harry Potter movies in a way, where all the pieces are there and it looks great, but there is no real spark to the characters to make you care about them. Perlman is a good actor, but I just don’t like the low-energy way he and del Toro chose to play the character – it’s a bit like the “aw shucks, I’m just a normal working stiff” of the Hugh Jackman Wolverine, but it didn’t fit quite as well.
IMHO, of course. Still, I thought it was definitely worth seeing in the theater.
“[A]ll the pieces are there and it looks great, but there is no real spark to the characters to make you care about them.”
Well-put. That was basically my problem with it too. Reflecting on it, I feel like I should’ve enjoyed it more…but, I just didn’t.