Je Suis Charlie Morrissey.

My only weakness is…well, never mind, never mind: By way of a little red-haired girl, Oakland graphic designer Lauren LoPrete, fuses Smiths lyrics with Peanut cartoons over at This Charming Charlie.

Life in the Big City.

“His rad book…includes the answers to such burning questions as, how do I hail a cab? What is a bodega? Which way is Uptown?” From a new book by cartoonist Nathan Pyle, Distractify shows off a number of spiffy animated primers on how to live/survive in NYC. Funny because they’re true, and definitely worth a perusal. The one above — a.k.a. the “Reservoir Dogs walk” — is a huge problem in DC also.

Wars without Williams.

As making the rounds of late, the raw C-SPAN feed of the Yavin 4 medal ceremony was a considerably weaker PR hit for the Rebellion, and no mistake. (Chewie in particular comes off much worse — This is like learning of Lincoln’s squeaky voice.)

Also in recent Original Trilogy-related humor, Black C-3PO (BL3PO? Either way, probably still less offensive than Jar Jar et al) and this analysis of the insurgency on Endor’s moon. “The Ewoks are not soldiers, but a tribal insurgency — and a remarkably successful one once they receive the backing of foreign special forces.”

“Dark Wings, Dumb Words.”

By way of Do You Feel Loved, various social media networks get their Westeros sigils. Theirs is the funny.

Gashlygame Over.

“Video game characters are always getting stabbed, burned, blasted, electrocuted, and crushed — when they aren’t falling to their dooms. So they’re perfect for this macabre poem in the style of Edward Gorey’s The Gashlycrumb Tinies.” (Via io9).

Midichlorians? Garmonbozia… | Leland ’14.

He’s more machine now than man, twisted and evil. David Lynch’s Return of the Jedi. (Hey, it almost happened.) I’ll admit, the Sy Snootles gag cracked me up.

“You’ve been dead for around 25 years now.” Also in the Lynch department: For the new Blu-Ray collection Twin Peaks: The Entire Mystery (take my money!), David Lynch interviews the Palmer family, in character. The Leland/Ray Wise one is below. It’s, er, weird…but you already knew that.

You Win or You Restart/Discard.

Now here’s a Super Mario land that Bob Hoskins would’ve been more at home in — Game of Thrones, Mario-style.

Update: Now, Hyrule gets the same treatment.

Baked Potato? Not yet.

“This one commercial said ‘Forget everything you know about slip covers,’ so I did. And it was a load off my mind. Then the commercial tried to sell slip covers, but I didn’t know what the f**k they were.”

Buzzfeed offers up a ranking of every single Mitch Hedberg joke. RIP. “I find that a duck’s opinion of me is very much influenced over whether or not I have bread.”

Fake It to Make It.

“‘I told myself I’d stay here until 8:30, and I already killed about 15 minutes avoiding conversation by circling repeatedly around the table of hors d’oeuvres to appear occupied, and another cumulative half hour pretending to text friends, so I just need to make it a few more minutes,’ the tense man told reporters.”

Report: Only 20 Minutes Until Introverted Man Gets To Leave Party. “At press time, sources reported that Brewer’s plans for withdrawal were dangerously imperiled by a partygoer’s insistence that the whole group hit up a nearby bar.”

Obviously She’s Not a Golfer.

“Lipinski glided around the rink in a white v-neck and bathrobe, all while holding a White Russian. Yes, there is a beverage there, man. I like pretty much all things Lebowski-related, so I support this, but feel compelled to call bullshit on that not being a real White Russian. Unless they just used really heavy cream in it, which would be very Dudelian.”

Can’t say I’m a big watcher of the Olympics — I don’t think I saw a single second of the London games in 2012, but I was in dissertation mode then — and particularly the Winter Olympics. But you know what would get me to partake? More Lebowski-themed numbers. Tara Lipinski channels the Dude for Jimmy Fallon’s last week at 12:30 (who, Roots be damned, bid his farewell with Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem.)