Tag: Mel Gibson

Life Through Other Means.

In the trailer bin of late:

  • Whatever they may show in the trailer for Jodie Foster’s family dramedy The Beaver, I’m guessing Mel Gibson’s imaginary puppet friend says unspeakably filthy things in his downtime. Anyways, The Beaver also has Foster, Anton Yelchin, Jennifer Lawrence, and Cherry Jones. Tell me if it isn’t terrible.

  • Rome‘s Ray Stevenson gets his chance to shine as a son of Eire among the seventies Mob in the trailer for Jonathan Hensleigh’s Kill the Irishman, based on the true story of Danny Greene and co-starring Val Kilmer, Christopher Walken, Vinnie Jones, Linda Cardellini, Vincent D’Onofrio, and a whole lot of usual suspects in the mobster kingdom (Steven Schirippa, Robert Davi, Mike Starr, Paul Sorvino.) Eh, definitely maybe.
  • HUGH JACKMAN. BOXING ROBOTS. SHAWN LEVY’S REAL STEEL. 10.7.11 (Oof. Only if there’s a lot of drinking involved beforehand.)
  • “There’s a distinct visual look, and a grand scope, and even of a sense of narrative (sort of). What’s hinted at here is a big-canvas movie in the best sense, one with both cosmic significance and intimate drama.” Sadly, the trailer that prompted this post doesn’t seem to be online yet. Nonetheless, in front of Black Swan last week was our first look at Terence Malick’s eagerly-awaited The Tree of Life. And it looks appropriately mystical and Malickian: May 27th, 2011. Update: It’s finally up.

Dragons and Mayans.

In the trailer bin, two December epics that I suspect will be pretty bad. First, newcomer Ed Speleers gets help from Obi-Wan-ish dragonrider Jeremy Irons in his crusade against the sinister King Malkovich in the new full-length trailer for Eragon (I haven’t read the book, but this screams Sci-Fi channel miniseries.) And the Mayan civilization enters its decline (no doubt the Jews have something to do with it) in the most recent trailer for Mel Gibson’s Apocalypto.

Apocalypto Now.

“Every time I think I’m going to wake up back in the jungle…” The strange teaser for Mel Gibson’s Mayan epic Apocalypto is now online. Looks intriguing, although to be honest — with the Will Durant quote, Chichen Itza, rainforest scouting, and the panther attack — I had a hard time watching this and not thinking of Civ 4. Update: Look for the subliminal Mel…bizarre.

“The Jesus Chainsaw Massacre.”

We’ve heard from the pope (sort of) (“It is as it was?” Jesus was a tall blue-eyed white guy?), we’ve heard from Harry Knowles, but now the “real” reviews of The Passion (which I’ll probably see this weekend) are coming in fast, and so far they all say the same thing: Too much violence and gore, too little charity and grace. David Edelstein sums up the emerging consensus view: “This is a two-hour-and-six-minute snuff movie — The Jesus Chainsaw Massacre — that thinks it’s an act of faith.” And even Roger Ebert, an admirer of the film (and one whom I rarely agree with these days), confesses: “This is the most violent film I have ever seen.” Hoo boy. I was afraid of that. Beware the packs of bloodthirsty bible-thumpers on your way out, y’all.

Ecce Filmo.

From fighting the undead to praising the risen-again, the new trailer for Mel’s Passion (referred to by the ever-emphatic Harry Knowles as a “dead language gore film about one of the greatest stories ever told”) is now online. Looks like they’ve decided to go the subtitle route.

SERMON!! ON THE MOUNT!!!!

The official teaser for Mel Gibson’s Passion of the Christ is now online. Compared to the unofficial (and violent) one that made the rounds a few months ago, I have to say this one’s on the uninteresting side. In related news, I find it rather ridiculous that Gibson screened the film for the AICN guys this weekend, while denying a viewing to concerned religious groups (or, for that matter, the Pope.) For some reason, I don’t think a standard-issue Harry Knowles shill (in both literal and figurative purple prose, no less) is going to allay the fears of either the Vatican or the ADL about this film.

The Gospel According to Mel.

AICN gets its hands on the powerful (and very graphic) trailer for The Passion, Mel Gibson’s forthcoming version of the Christ story, as told in Aramaic and Latin. Given Gibson’s ultraconservative Catholicism, his rejection of the Second Vatican Council (which, among other things, repudiated the idea of Jewish collective guilt for the death of Jesus), and his father’s background of Anti-Semitism and Holocaust denial, I must admit I fear the worst about this project…but I’ll reserve judgment until I’ve seen the movie. To be sure, the trailer is a startling piece of work.

Long-haired freaky people need not apply.

Caught Signs over the weekend, and, I must say, it was the worst movie I’ve paid money for in some time. (Ok, Reign of Fire wasn’t very good, but it never pretended to be anything but a B-movie…one look at Matthew McConaughey as Ahab/Kurtz could tell you that. Signs has delusions of grandeur.) I liked both Sixth Sense and Unbreakable, so was quite dismayed at how dismal this film turned out. It’s hard to go into the many problems with it without giving the movie away, so click to reveal any spoilerific information below (and sorry this post now looks like a letter out of Catch-22):

a) Let’s begin with the ending….if you’ve seen it, you know what I’m going to say, but c’mon…the water bit made absolutely no sense. Even aside from the fact that both this planet and its inhabitants are made up of mostly water, what were these aliens going to do if it rained? b) Why travel interstellar distances in state-of-the-art ships, cloak after everyone’s seen you, and then run around the planet comprised of 75% water stark-naked? c) Why was the alien fx so horribly bad? It gave me shivers about Gollum. d) Every one of the small-town folk came off as completely Hollywood-false, particularly the good-hearted sheriff and Basil Exposition, the “probing” army recruiting officer. e) Mel’s a preacher, Joaquin’s a down-and-out minor leaguer…who’s actually harvesting all that corn? f) The ridiculous foreshadowing of Mel’s crisis of faith – “Don’t call me father” over and over again. Which brings me to another problem with the ending: So all of these signs somehow do add up to cosmic design, such as the kid having asthma and the dead wife being savvy enough to tell Mel it might be a good idea to have Slugger go after the alien with a baseball bat…what does this mean about God? He’s a God of Humanity only, unconcerned with the fate of this poor water-hating, lousy-FX alien? I don’t buy it.

g) The kids…ugh, the ever-lovin’ kids. Too wise, too special, too obnoxious. h) The family scenes, and particularly the strange last dinner episode and both of the ill-timed disquisitions on childbirth…flat, bizarre, and wholly unrealistic. i) The television. You’d think after 9-11 it’d be much easier to create realistic looking “crisis television.” But every time they turned on the idiot box it was stilted, exposition time again, the Brazilian birthday party scene aside, one of the only legitimately scary and well-done sequences in the film. j) With the exception of the shiny knife under the pantry door (don’t get me started on why these aliens have so many issues with doors – this away team didn’t bring a phaser or an axe to their alien invasion?), almost all of the “Hitchcockian flourishes” seemed too consciously crafted, particularly both long scenes involving the flashlight. I think I liked it better when it was called “The Blair Witch Project.” Ok, enough dissing the film. Suffice to say, I don’t recommend it. Joaquin was very good, and to be honest Mel wasn’t bad either. I blame Shyamalan. (In happier news, I saw Sexy Beast on DVD last night and quite enjoyed it.)