Prisoners of Carrey, Gangs of LA.

Also missed during my own private blackout: New trailers for Lemony Snicket’s A Series of Unfortunate Events (Haven’t read the books, but know enough to know that this shouldn’t be such a Jim Carrey vehicle) and Martin Scorsese’s The Aviator (Looks intriguing, although the Old Hollywood stuff looks like more fun than the planes.)

Irkutsk from Yakutsk…

Ok, I’ll take a card. The teaser for Oliver Stone’s Alexander hits the web and, while I generally enjoy Oliver Stone movies, this look doesn’t differentiate the film from Troy, King Arthur, or any other recent Gladiator meets RotK-CGI type flick. Uh oh.

Hell boy.

Also new today is the first teaser for Constantine. Everything about this trailer looks pretty solid, except, alas, for the title character. I’m not a Keanu-hater by any means, but he’s not playing John Constantine here, not even close. Constantine is a hard-drinking, chain-smoking, trenchcoat-wearing Brit. Keanu is, well, Keanu. The differences are palpable.

Eyes, Spies, Tom, and Cat.

It’s Friday, and at the end of a grim-visaged week, the world needs more trailers. In the bin today, we’ve got a new view of The Chronicles of Riddick, Vin Diesel and David Twohy’s follow-up to Pitch Black (sadly, it still looks like a very expensive Sci-Fi Channel original movie), evil Tom Cruise in Michael Mann’s Collateral (The LA gunplay of Heat meets the visual style of The Insider), the first look at The Bourne Supremacy (Identity was a nice surprise, although this one seems very similar), and the teaser for Halle Berry’s embarrassing-looking Catwoman (The early buzz has been awful, and this blah clip won’t change it.)

Purple Village People Eaters.

Evil unseen alien forces threatening rustic Americana…let’s hope they can handle water this time. Yep, it’s the trailer for the new M. Night Shyamalan movie. With Sigourney Weaver, Adrien Brody, Brendan Gleeson, and a strange period vibe to it, I’d normally be quite enthused about The Village. But Signs was so lousy and self-absorbed that the bloom is off the Shyamalan rose, and this looks to me like more of the same. Plus, William Hurt has been phoning it in now for at least a decade, and he usually means the kiss of death for a film these days.

Streep on Lansbury.

Undeterred by the lukewarm reception to The Truth about Charlie, Jonathan Demme tries his hand at another remake in this new trailer for The Manchurian Candidate. Hmm…so the Communists have been replaced by a corporate conglomerate (Manchurian Global), and Sinatra is now Denzel. That works, although Meryl Streep seems wildly over the top here. (In fact, she may even be out-Voighting Jon Voight.) Well, let’s hope it’s a return to form for Demme, and not another needless remake.

Holy Holes and Broken Bats.

Also in the trailer pipeline of late, “Jesus” Jim Caviezel channels Bobby Jones in Stroke of Genius (Not in a million years…this feels like a Lifetime movie, right down to Claire Forlani as the long-suffering wife…and where’s Bagger Vance?), and Bernie Mac rests on his hitting laurels in Mr. 3000 (Nice of ’em to condense the entire movie into a three minute viewing experience.)